Ignoring problems is one of life’s great pleasures. Cans of worms spend years on dusty shelves, supported by brackets of fear. Difficult conversations are kept at bay.
But I have learnt, and am still learning, that somehow these unaddressed fears eventually catch up with you. Opening these cans of worms may disrupt a perfectly organised life, but the honesty that the action will initiate makes for a better, happier future.
My incredibly beautiful friend Lidia has been talking to me about my interest in shapes, colours and style for years. Two glasses of wine down and I am flattered that she thinks I could do something, but by the next morning I’m back to my day job.
Fear of failure has played an important role in this reversion to mean, as has the potentially negative judgement of others. I haven’t been brave enough to put my ill-structured thoughts and outfits out in the public eye.
Another struggle has been the superficiality associated with the industry. I am the daughter of a doctor and a lawyer; my role models have had important careers that have really affected other people’s lives. How can I go to them and say I want to write about cardigans?
Then I remember one story from my early 20s, of which I have to remind myself. A slightly nervous woman came into the clothes shop I was working in. I asked her if she wanted any help and she said no, so I left her. I double-checked with her a few minutes later and she did then explain that it was her son’s 21st birthday party that night and it would be the first time she was seeing her ex-husband and his new partner. She was nervous and wanted to look her best, but had no idea where to start. We spent a couple of hours together trying various things on and eventually she walked out of the shop with her head held high, delighted with her new outfit. She had her armour.
And that is why clothes are so important. Her entire mood had been changed by the way her outfit made her feel. She could now take on the world.
So that’s why I’ve decided to open my own can of worms and address my fear of failure. I’m going to write about shapes and colours and the way they make people feel. This won’t be a blog about trends, it will be a blog about women and men using clothes to better express who they are and how they feel.